The Overthinker’s Dilemma: How to Stop Overthinking and Start Living in 5 Steps


Do you remember school exams, when you weren’t 100% sure which option was correct and you were browsing your memory, searching for answers?
Perhaps you’ve heard your teacher say: if you don’t know the answer, go with your first instinct.

1. Inner Compass

And perhaps you’ve also realized that many times they were absolutely right…
I find it amazing how powerful this phrase is, and how well our instinct navigates us when we lose clarity. And how relieved and relaxed we become when we tune in and learn to listen to our internal wisdom and actually follow our inner voice.

2. But why we hesitate?

Overthinking is very common and often connected to perfectionism and the need to be in control. The thing is, while focusing on something can be helpful, as it drives us towards our goals, it can also affect our wellbeing. As soon as we focus on something unimportant, it may lead to stress and overwhelm. This month I’ve talked to some very bright people whom overthinking and fixating on certain topics led to burnout, panic attacks, anxiety, depression, insomnia. In order to overcome that we need to understand something.

3. It’s not your fault

Focusing on negatives isn’t your fault – our mind is actually hardwired to focus on bad things, because that’s how we lived and how we survived. It saved our ancestors their lives.
Even though we’re programmed to focus on threats, that itself may become a threat to our mental health. Luckily, we can change the way we direct our attention and make other choices.
It’s mind-blowing how powerfully we can transform when we understand what makes us overthink and break that downward spiral of ‘what ifs’ and regrets.

4. Ask yourself

What happens when you stop overthinking?
Life gets easier. And simpler.
What helps?
I strongly believe that finding the root cause and understanding what’s keeping overthinking going is the way to go. By understanding the origin of the issue and uncovering the reason your mind still has to keep it in your life, it becomes possible to effectively handle it and remove it from your life. And instill in you a sense of clarity that makes decision making an easier process. For good.

5. Chinese whispers in hypnosis and subconscious mind

I love the “first thought, best thought” idea and I use it in hypnosis. It’s like “Chinese whispers” and it’s amazing how quickly we get to the core, to the very “best”, the most real answers; without a filter, but truly connecting with our self.

Hypnosis makes it so much quicker and easier to get results. The conscious, logical factor is then switched off. Your inner critic shuts down as you enter the realm of the subconscious, which is your greatest resource.  And it’s so natural. When you learn how to tap into it, you can eliminate what causes you doubt everything, or what forces you to try be perfect. You can sync in with your intuition, quit a race towards perfection, and install confidence and your inner compass for good.
This practice can be life-changing.

About the author

Psychologist, RTT Therapist trained by world-class therapist Marisa Peer, Clinical Hypnotherapist, Mindfulness Coach

Result-oriented therapist, focused on treating the root cause of an issue, resilient mindset shifts, reprogramming subconscious beliefs and building lifelong habits that support your transformation

Here to help if you are motivated to take charge of your life, committed to your transformation, value your time and are looking for fast results that stick after as little as 1 – 3 sessions

Offering powerful therapy online and in person, based in Utrecht, the Netherlands, happy to work with non-native speakers and expat communities, in English or Polish

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